Lost and Found
by UllielVirdiancht
Summary: A short fic about Oichi and Ranmaru, since I like these two. Events after Oichi's ending in SW2


Oichi POV

Night came again; this is the fourth night where I will spend my time alone without Nagamasa with me. I sit alone in my room, staring into the bright full moon through the window. The wind blows and it feels so cold, it tells me that the winter will come soon. I change my vision into the cherry blossom tree on the castle's garden. The tree looks dry, there are no leaves left in there. I believe that it will die soon, just like me.

I close my eyes and hug myself, trying to make this body warm. Nagamasa always do this to me. When the weather feels cold, he sat beside me and gave me an embrace with his steady arms. His arms protected me and when I looked upon his face, he smiled to me. His smile is so tender and it always made me feel safe when I saw it.

But now, there's no smile. Nagamasa is not here with me, he's not in this world anymore. When I met him in the battlefield, I just wanted him to come back. I just wanted him to know that I don't want to lose him, that's why I fought him. But destiny was not on our side, I couldn't do anything when I saw Nagamasa's cold body lied in my lap.

I open my eyes and I can feel that there's a single tear in my cheek. I can't hold my tears anymore; I can't take out Nagamasa from my head. I keep crying and cover my face with my hands. Tears keep flowing and slowly I lose my breath.

"Naga…masa…"

After a while, I stop crying. Slowly, I get up from my position and walk out from the room. I need a fresh air and maybe if I take a walk outside, I could probably forget about what I did to Nagamasa. I could probably forget that I killed him…

I walk through the castle's silent corridor. I pass some rooms, most of them are dark but there are some of them with lights on. I keep walking through the hallway; I don't have any intentions to look inside those rooms. Then, I walk pass my brother's room, I stop for a while and stare into that door.

Brother knows that I killed Nagamasa that time and he also knows about my depression state. A day after the incident, he called me into his room and we talked for a while. My mind starts to drift into that moment.

"Oichi".

I kept silence and looked into the tatami floor. I really didn't want to talk.

"I know that you're sad, but you can't stay like this forever" my brother's voice, Oda Nobunaga sounded so stern in my ears, "nothing stays forever in this world".

I lifted my head and stared into the Demon King's face sternly "I know that".

My brother exhaled a deep breath and shook his head "Honestly, I never thought that you will kill him, no one thought that".

"I…", I wanted to talk but my voice was stuck in the middle of my throat, "I just want him to come back to me, I only want that…"

"But the truth is that he chose to defend the Asakura clan than you!", my brother's voice started to reach a high pitch. I shocked when I heard his words, those words really stabbed my heart, "If he really devoted to you, he should've known what he should do!".

My head hung low and I can feel that tears started to form in my eyes. I bit my lower lip tightly; trying hard to hold the tears from falling. If he saw me cry, he must be really upset with me.

"Oichi, I want you to live your life. Nagamasa's death is not fully your fault because he's already chosen his own way. I don't want to see you always sad like this".

I still hung my head. There's a concern inside my brother's voice and that surprised me because he never showed it to anyone. But I know that his words were right, I can't stay like this forever. Brother has already shown his worried to me, even my brother's wife, No, also showed the same thing. If I keep sad like this, they will get upset to me.

I wake up from my reverie. I walk again and decide that I don't want to wake him up now. He must have another important matter to talk rather than hearing my problems.

xxx

Finally, I'm in the castle's garden now. I stand still for a while and stare into the empty garden in front of me. The torch lights the place with reddish orange ray. Slowly, I exhale a deep breath and enjoying this solitude.

I turn my head when I hear a soft melody of a flute enters my ear. I walk rather quickly to search for source of that beautiful melody. My steps increase rapidly and I finally found it.

There I see someone is sitting under the cherry blossom tree. He's the one who plays the flute. And for me, I never thought that he can play such a wonderful melody like that.

He is still playing his flute; his eyes are closed that's why he doesn't know that I'm walking into him. I stop not too far away from him and keep listening to his play. The melody sounds incredibly beautiful, I feel like I'm flying when I hear it. The melody flows beautifully like water, but there's a latent sadness inside. I don't know why but I just knew it.

"Lady Oichi?"

The melody stops and I know that he realized that I'm here. He stands up quite fast and gives me a bow. His long black hair is swinging lightly when he bows his body, "I am sorry. I did not know that you are here".

I give him a smile for that, "That's fine, Ranmaru".

Ranmaru stand still and face me, "What are you doing in such time, my lady?" he asks with pure curiosity.

"I can't sleep. What about you?"

"This is my schedule to patrol for tonight" he answers with a gentle smile.

"Only you?" I ask in amazement because I don't see anyone here besides him.

Ranmaru shook his head "My post is here while the others are in the north gate".

I nod my head and smile lightly. Mori Ranmaru, my brother's best soldier and bodyguard. He's a very talented young man, his ability in swordsmanship is unquestionable and his loyalty to Oda Nobunaga is the best in this realm. He is a very attractive man if I may say; he has a very beautiful face and strikingly feminine figure. His outfit also doesn't look like a man in common. He wears a purple kimono and shorts, he only wears shield for his arms. He is very different compared to Nagamasa, who is always wearing armor and war helmet.

Aside from those, Ranmaru is a strong yet a fearsome person in the battlefield. He never loses from battle and I always heard from my maid about Ranmaru's greatness.

"I shall take my leave" Ranmaru's voice shatters my reverie. He looks kinda odd with this silence. He bows his body before take his leave.

"Please wait!" I said quickly and grab his hand when he walks beside me. Ranmaru turns his head and I can see a surprised expression on his face.

"Lady Oichi?" Ranmaru asks me anxiously.

I hold Ranmaru's hand tightly. I feel like I'm starting to lose my sanity, I don't know what I am doing right now. I keep holding that hand; I don't want him to go away, not now.

"Don't go away, I don't want to be alone" I said with a choked voice. Tears start to flow again.

"Bu-but Lady Oichi…"

"Nagamasa, please don't go. I beg you…" my knees start to wobble. I'm starting to lose my balance and without any warning, I fall on my knees but I don't let go my grip on him. I still holding him,"Naga…masa…"

I start to cry again. Honestly, I really hate myself right now. After Nagamasa's death, I become a very weak person. I can't be my old self again, when Nagamasa is still here I have vowed myself as long as I'm with him, I can come through any obstacles. Tears keep flowing and I don't know how to stop it. Please, someone help me to stop crying…

"Lady Oichi" suddenly I felt a soft and warm touch in my cheek. It moves gently in my skin and wipes away the tears. It doesn't belong to Nagamasa, it belongs to someone else. I slowly lift my head to see the owner this beautiful touch.

The owner is Ranmaru, the one and only.

I rub my eyes a few times and I realize that the person who I called Nagamasa is actually Ranmaru. He, who is kneeling in front of me now, is Mori Ranmaru, not Azai Nagamasa.

My lips tremble and I feel so stupid,"Ranmaru…"

xxx

I'm inside the guard post now. I sit on tatami while looking into the candle's dim light. Ranmaru is not here, he's in the kitchen right now.

This room is quite big, clean and also comfortable. There's a small, short-legged table in the middle of the room. I turn my head and I see stationery which is stored neatly in the drawer, probably it's Ranmaru's. I also see a neatly rolled futon in the corner.

"Sorry for waiting" Ranmaru comes out from behind the sliding door with a glass of tea. The young man serves me a glass of tea and a plate of onigiri. Then he sits down in the other side of the table with a smile on his face, "I am sorry. I can only serve you this, my lady" he said with a soft tone.

"Thank you" I answer and nodding my head. This man is too humble; he doesn't need to be like that all the time.

I take one of the onigiri and eat it, "Wow, it's good" I said with amazement. This young man is really one of a kind.

"Thank you, Lady Oichi" he answers with a humble voice, but I know that he's shy because of the compliment.

I finished my food before talking to Ranmaru. I really want to talk to someone, I don't want to ask for opinion, I only want them to listen.

"Ranmaru, I'm sorry".

"For what, my lady?" he asks with confusion.

"I have disturbed you tonight" I said this with a slight embarrassment. I turn my head away from Ranmaru, I don't feel I can see his face after what I've done before, "You saw my weakness and I feel… awkward with that".

I took a deep breath and shook my head, "I don't understand myself why I did that, but…" my voice stops again. I lift my head and take a peek into Ranmaru's face, he looks very serious now. He listens to my words with full attention.

"But I miss him", I said with my voice stuck in my throat, "I want to be with Nagamasa, but he's not here anymore because…"

I look into my hands and I feel scared. My heart beats very fast and I tremble like crazy, "I have KILLED HIM!! Ranmaru, I killed Nagamasa!!".

Silence falls between us. There's no voice between me and Ranmaru. This silence slowly feels so heavy and I can feel it through my veins. My head feels like splitting and I can hardly breathe, I can't take this anymore.

"Lord Nagamasa is not dead" suddenly Ranmaru's voice occurs in this room. I jerked my head and look at him straight. The man is still sitting in front of me and his face looks shiny because of the moonlight.

"What did you say…?"

"Physically, Lord Nagamasa is not in this world anymore, but his soul will live forever as long as Lady Oichi keeps his memory within. Although Lady Oichi killed him, you did that not because you hate him. Lady Oichi really loves him" Ranmaru's voice sounds so steady in my ears.

"Personally, I also sad because I have to lost a great figure like Lord Nagamasa, but I shall not let him die because…" Ranmaru puts his hand on his chest and give me his heart-throbbing smile, "I will keep his memories inside my heart".

I rolled my eyes, not giving any respond to Ranmaru's words. This room is being covered by an awkward silence once again.

"Easy for you to say…"

"Excuse me?" Ranmaru sounds confused.

I lift my head and stare into Ranmaru's face with rage inside my heart, "How dare you to talk like that! You could say that because you were not the one who killed him were you!?"

Ranmaru doesn't show any expression. He shuts his mouth and he is starting to make me angry, "Why you silence? You don't have any words again to tell me!?" I ask him with high voice. I don't care if somebody can hear us.

Ranmaru still doesn't give me any answer and I'm running out of patience. I grip the tip of my kimono tightly and trying hard to bury my anger.

"I saw that moment".

I jerked my head and look into Ranmaru straight in the eyes. His expression changed, he looks sad. He exhaled deeply and shifting his vision to another direction, "When Lord Nobunaga ordered you to become the commander on that battle; I knew that the end will surely come to Lord Nagamasa and the Asakura. That's why, that day I made a plan".

I shut my mouth and listen closely to what he would say.

"That day, for the first time, I disobeyed Lord Nobunaga's order. I left my post quietly and went into Lord Nagamasa's main camp before your arrival".

I feel like there's something that stabs my heart and I have a very bad feeling about this. My body is trembling and I feel afraid to hear the rest of Ranmaru's story.

"I knew that Lord Nagamasa did not have any chance to win, which is why I was trying to ask him to run away from that place quickly. But when I got there…"

"So you saw it…?" I asked. My voice is hissing like snake. My eyes are still staring to the young warrior who is sitting in front of me.

Ranmaru hung his head and answers my question with nod. He seems afraid to answer my question directly.

"You… saw me killed Nagamasa?" my question is being answered by nod again. I fall silence, anger and sadness are mixing inside my heart. My body starts to rumble and I really want to kill Ranmaru now, "And you didn't stop me?"

"I am really sorry, Lady Oichi…"

And all emotions explode now. I stand quickly and attack Ranmaru until his body lie on the floor. I sit on his body and hold his shoulder tightly, not giving him any room to move. Rage is covering my mind right now, I can't think clearly.

"You DIDN'T STOP ME!? WHY!?" I scream while looking into Ranmaru's face. I lift my fist and punch him in his chest multiple times with all of my strength "YOU BASTARD, RANMARU!!!"

I keep punching him and I can hear a low growl of pain occurs from Ranmaru. I keep my pace; I don't want to give him mercy. I hung my head and I start to cry uncontrollably, "You bastard!!! You're just like my brother!!!"

"Lady Oichi, please…"

"I will kill you, Ranmaru!!! Then I will kill my brother!!! He's the source of this ruin!!"

"You cannot kill Lord Nobunaga!!" suddenly Ranmaru's expression changes. His eyes are shining and his voice sounds so stern. He looks at me and I froze.

"Lady Oichi, you may kill me but do not dare to kill Lord Nobunaga" his voice is making my heart skip a beat. We shut our lips and our vision is locked together, "Then again, if you kill him, you are just the same as Lord Nobunaga".

My eyes are wide open in shock and I feel confused, "Eh?"

"Lord Nobunaga is a man who does not hesitate to kill the others in order to accomplish his goal. Lady Oichi please, this world does not need two person like Lord Nobunaga" Ranmaru's voice is growing soft and his expression change.

"… then why? Why did you keep serving him with loyalty like this?" I ask him with confusion inside my head.

The young man is smiling lightly to my question, "Because this is my way of life, it is that simple".

Tes…

Ranmaru's eyes are blinking and he looks startled. He turns his head and look at me again, "Lady Oichi, why are you crying?"

I shook my head. Slowly, I let him go and sit quietly beside him. I cover my face with my hands and crying in silence. I can hear Ranmaru wakes up from his position and sit beside me.

"I don't know what I should do, Ranmaru…" I said with an odd voice because of my covered face, "I don't know".

"Live the life, my lady" he said to me with his deep voice. When I hear that, I take a deep breath and wipe the tears from my cheek. Then I turn my head and stare into that beautiful boy with watery eyes.

"Live the life, Lady Oichi. We only live once, don't waste it by crying".

Ranmaru shuts his mouth for a while and he looks at me. The way he looks makes me feel odd. I can hardly tell that there's something behind those clear eyes. We keep our mouth closed, my eyes meet with his.

"I feel sad when I saw Lady Oichi sad" he said with a low voice. His face turns away, his voice sounds like a whisper, "I want to help you, but I don't know what I should do…"

I can't say anything when I heard those words. I never thought that Ranmaru is a person who has that kind of thinking, a thinking which not everyone has it.

Without realizing it, I rise from my position and walk into Ranmaru. That young man sit still and there's a surprised expression in his beautiful face, "Lady Oichi?" he asks me when I sit beside him.

"Ranmaru, thank you" those words are the only thing that I can say. I don't know what to do to return the favor, he is a very kind man and I have to do or say something to show him my gratitude.

"Thank goodness that I have met you tonight, Ranmaru".

Ranmaru nods his head and smile, "Me too, Lady Oichi".

And my body moves again. I crawl to Ranmaru and in a flash; my hand is resting in his cheek. I can see an odd look in Ranmaru's face, but he doesn't turn his head from me. He looks at me; his round clear eyes are staring through me.

"Lady Oichi, don't…" he said with a whisper when I bring his face close to mine.

I put my finger on his soft lips and shook my head, "Sssh, no more talking".

"Lady Oichi, please. You should not do this. I am only your servant, I do not deserve to…" Ranmaru try to argue me but I silence him with a kiss.

I feel a strange sensation inside my body when I did this; I never kissed anyone else beside Nagamasa. And now, in this room, I kiss Ranmaru. It feels so good but also so wrong, I know that there must be something broken inside my head. I know that I have betrayed Nagamasa and take advantage from Ranmaru. But I can't help it, I can't control my mind and I don't know what else to do.

I part my lips from his; I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Both of my hands are still resting on his cheek and our face is only inches away. I can feel Ranmaru's warm breath tickles my neck; his body is trembling in my hand.

I open my eyes and locked my vision into the man whom I start to love. His face is red and he looks very cute like a little boy, "Lady Oichi…" that's the only words which come out from his mouth. His voice is trembling and wavering.

"Tonight…" I said to him while caressing my hand in his cheek. My voice choked again and I begin to cry, "Can I sleep here? With you?"

Ranmaru's eyes are wide open with shock, but it doesn't take long. Slowly, he nods his head and smile to me, "Yes".

Then Ranmaru reaches my hand and put it in his lips. I can feel the softness of his lips touch my fingertip. I can't do anything, my heart beats like frenzy now. My eyes locked with him, staring into that beautiful face.

Ranmaru kisses my fingertip and a strange vibe strikes through me. I can't help but moan a little for his touch. And a moment later, there's a sudden warmth covered my fingers.

Ranmaru puts two of my finger inside his mouth. He sucks it gently like a sweet candy. My heartbeat doubles in a second and pleasure begins to build inside my body. I sit like a stone and all I can do is looking into his face.

Ranmaru, do you know that we are doing something wrong now? I believe that you understand about it, but you don't care. You never care because you are a man who always follows your heart.

Then he puts my fingers out from his mouth and let it linger in his lips. He bites my fingertip, which is already wet of his drool, in a gentle way. His eyes are shining and locked with mine, it looks so deep and my cheeks start to blush like ripe tomato.

"Lady Oichi, your face is red" he said with his deep, seductive tone.

I give him a nervous smile and anxiety is roaring inside me, "You have done this to the other girls before?" I ask. Oh dear, now that's a stupid question. In a moment like this, I should've known that I don't need to ask that kind of question.

Ranmaru takes a step forward and brings his face closer. His firm hand creeps into my head and in a blink of eye, he takes my ribbon off. My hair falls like water through my shoulder.

"No, Lady Oichi is the first" he whispers softly in my ears.

Don't know why but I feel relieved to hear that. I give him my smile and Ranmaru kisses me again. I drown inside him, I give in to the kiss, I give in to Ranmaru.

I move my hand and slowly loosen the knot of Ranmaru's obi. Without any difficulty, I take out every clothes from Ranmaru's slender body. I too feel that my clothes are getting loose in every second. Probably it's only a matter of time until my clothes off from my body.

Ranmaru doesn't know that I cry. He doesn't know that there's a single tear escapes from my eyes, but let it be; he doesn't need to know. Ranmaru doesn't need to know about my feelings now.

I screamed inside my heart. I screamed to Nagamasa who is watching me from the heavens above, '_I'm sorry, Nagamasa'._

_Oichi, define happiness…_

I shocked when I heard that voice. I'm very sure that it was Nagamasa, but I can't feel his presence here.

_Oichi, you never betrayed me. You have to find happiness…_

And the voice disappears. My body feels numb like lead; my wet eyes are wide open. I can't breathe and my lips are trembling, silently whispering Nagamasa's name.

"Lady Oichi? You okay?"

I heard his voice, my reverie broken again and I turn my head to face him. Ranmaru is here, he's with me now and I can see a deep concern covering his face.

I shook my head and bring his face closer. Our forehead touches and I give him a caress on his lips, "I'm okay, Ranmaru".

xxx

Finally morning comes; the sun hasn't showed its ray today. Birds are singing playfully outside and I can smell the scent of morning in my nostril. I heard those birds and slowly open my eyes. I let out a small groan and rub my sleepy eyes.

I look outside and see that there's still a fog lingering in the air. Then I turn my head and look into the man who is still sleeping beside me.

Ranmaru is still sleeping, nice and sound. His face looks so peaceful, makes my heart flutter when I see him. His beautiful body is being covered by the blanket and his long black hair obscured half of his face.

I lean forward and brushing the hair from his face. It feels so nice to touch his silky hair; it feels like water slipping through my fingers. I touch his face again, feeling the softness of his skin in my hand again.

My good Ranmaru, he really is a one in a million man in this world. If only I meet him before I meet Nagamasa, I'm very sure that we can be a lover. He doesn't ask much, not forcing himself, he just perfect. My dear Ranmaru, you don't know how beautiful you are with everything you got.

I smile lightly to Ranmaru and give him a kiss on the forehead. Maybe this is the last kiss that I give to him. Then I swift my head and look at our scattered clothes in tatami floor. Without waking Ranmaru, I slowly wake up. Before I put my clothes on and leave, I give Ranmaru one last glance.

"Thank you, Ranmaru…"

Ranmaru POV

I wake up when I feel the presence beside me disappear. I open my eyes and realize that Oichi is not here anymore, her clothes are gone too. Then I turn my head and see my clothes are being put nicely on the table.

With a small groan, I rise from my position and sit down. Last night incident are being replayed inside my head. Yesterday night, me and Oichi were doing it. That time, I'm losing myself and I can't resist Oichi. It begun with a kiss then… everything happened.

Oichi gave everything to me. She gave her heart, her love, her body and her soul. Everything only for one night, but we know that this will stay in our heart forever. In one night, every unthinkable thing happened. Silencing every sense that I have and my pride. We were already drowned in our passion.

But it felt so right, it was wrong but still… it felt right. Me and her didn't want to let go of this newfound feelings…

I hung my head and rub my right temple. I feel strange, I know that what we've done was just an 'intermezzo', but I don't know what I should do if I meet Oichi again.

I'm afraid that I can't hold my feelings if I see her face, I'm afraid that she know that I'm madly in love with her…

"Snap out of it, Ranmaru. You will never together with Oichi. She's your master and you're her servant, you should have understood that".

I take a deep breath and rise from my position. And that's when I saw a piece of paper on the futon where Oichi lied. With a curiosity, I pick up the paper and read it.

It's a letter from Oichi. It has a few sentences in it.

Thank you for everything you have done to me. Truthfully, I still love Nagamasa, but I can't lie about my new feelings for you. If we shall meet again on the next life, I hope we can be together forever.

For my beloved, Ranmaru

I hug that letter and kiss it; I can smell Oichi's body scent from the letter and imagine her when she wrote the letter with a smile on her graceful face.

This life is so short and I realize that loving someone can be an ironic matter. Until this time, I tried to bury my feelings to Oichi, I love her but I don't know whether she loves me too or not.

But now, there's no doubt in my heart. I know that Oichi is the one for me; I shall love her with unwavering feelings although she can never be mine.

Lady Oichi, let's hope in our next life, me and you can be together…


End file.
